The Years of Solicitude and the Rest

When The House is Left Empty

Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Mat 11:28 

It is another morning of solemn anxiety. The sun is absent. The cold is bitingly chilly. The children went with the wind. Scattered in the wide world web trying to make a meaning out of life.

The cuckoo left the nest and has never returned.

The tenement is big, only the loneliness is bigger. I gave up trying to fight it many years ago. I tried to shoot it but the bullets went astray. Now I pump drugs at it in doses big enough to kill an elephant but it refuses to die.

Oh, the encumbrance, the soreness! How I would give away all this for a real life!

My mind is like a mountain covered in fog. I try to see ahead but soon I lose the track. I sound so ancient I fear to read the books and find it is the truth. My body sweats and all the windows go misty. It is no wonder since water is the only thing I find tasty these days.

I miss the smell and the fragrances that were once the life of this house. Oops! I even forget my own smell. When was the last time I took a bath? God bring down water and fill this house.

Memories break through this mind like a sea-wave. They scatter their debris upon the shore of my naked body. Yeah. The knots are fallen off in pleasant places indeed! They are all over me and isn’t that nice?

Ha! Ha! Ha!

At least I can manage that. Though it hurts just to open my mouth. So there is nothing free in life after all? The spider that got stuck in its own weave. Later it died.

In the noon the sun breaks through. The beams splash the earth with bewitching effulgence. In the lawn outside the flowers are beside themselves with a fervent song. I wish I could sing like that. I wish I could be a flower! That splendor.  God why didn’t you make me a flower?

There was music once. There was life. There was song. There was rhythm and dance, and harmony. The cars didn’t honk needlessly, and people talked calmly without scaring the children. The people spoke the truth and they didn’t struggle to be believed.

A boy my own grandchild’s age made passes at me and swore it wasn’t for my money. I almost believed him, poor me. If I had strength in my teeth I should have given him a mouth lashing to last him until his next birthday. If I had strength in my teeth.

Is this all that my years have come to, to gather together in a languishing sigh the debris of yester years? Perhaps it’s true what the Preacher said. Is this the profit?  But I loved his closing remarks. Life can still be sweet. Life can still be livable again no matter what.

Look to the cross and cast there your burdens. For He cares for you. The malignant will heal. The flesh will return to the bone. And you will live again. If you want to. The children will return home. The maelstrom will stop. The din will vanish. The fog will clear and the sun will shine again.

The lurch will go. The strength will return. Noel will be back. The snow will lay side by side with the sun and no one will melt. God’s breath will be audible again in this house.

Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.

I close my eyes and the song just flows ceaselessly over me, washing me, and cleansing me. After a long long time there is water in my house again and I can bathe!

Come, Lord, wash me. Father, cleanse me so I will be whiter than snow...

O Lord my God, when I in awesome wonder/Consider all the worlds Thy hands have made/I see the stars, I hear the rolling thunder/Thy power thru-out the universe displayed!

Then sings my soul, my Savior God to Thee, How great Thou art, how great Thou art! Then sings my soul, my Savior God, to thee; How great Thou art, how great Thou art!

When thru the woods and forest glades I wander/And hear the birds sing sweetly in the trees/When I look down from lofty mountain grandeur/And hear the brook and feel the gentle breeze/

Then sings my soul… (Carl Boberg, 1859-1940).

The End of this Matter is This

Flee the devil. Resist him. At all cost. If he wants to make you sad refuse. If he wants to heap up sorrows upon you like coals of fire refuse. If he wants to bring back again those fetid, unsavory memories of yester years shut that door with a loud bang and turn on the key. If you can, throw away the key altogether!

If it is memories of a bitter altercation that has stuck on you for years like a scab on a wound tear it and let the abscess flow out. After that the wound will heal. The skin will return. The beauty will knock again at the main door. Please let Him in!

Don’t shrink because the sun absconds. Don’t worry. Throw away anxiety. If love has gone out through the window it will come back again, through door. Why should you lack peace for the joy of the devil? Nature is adorned again in regal lyricism. The sheet is blank. Find the pen and write your own end in it. Write it.

For Devotion

“Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light” (Mat 11:28-30).

It is a rest to the soul. Not rest from life. It is not to bring you to death but to bring life back to you. It is to give you beauty for ashes. It is becoming born-again (John 3:3; Eph 1:13; 2:8-9; 1 Th 2:13; 2 Co 5:17; 1 Pe 1:23-25). It is not a passive rest. It will cost you but it is not your own money or strength. You come. The Holy Spirit does the rest (Eph 1:13).

If you don’t work you will die. If you don’t exercise you will die. Christianity is same. It requires spiritual exercises. Reading his Word, praying, serving. “For bodily exercise profiteth little: but godliness is profitable unto all things, having promise of the life that now is, and of that which is to come” (1Ti 4:8).

It is work, yes, but it is a labour of love, not even work! (Heb 6:10). “For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus unto good works, which God hath before ordained that we should walk in them” (Eph 2:10). “For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure” (Phi 2:13).

Lastly share the Good News. Don’t hoard! Actually it is a commandment. “And he said unto them, Go ye into all the world, and preach the gospel to every creature. He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned” (Mar 16:15-16). 

You will read, meditate and pray. So “[that] ye might walk worthy of the Lord unto all pleasing, being fruitful in every good work, and increasing in the knowledge of God” (Col 1:10). See also Col 3; Eph 5. Finally pray and ask God to give you the grace to understand “these things” (Mat 7:7-8; Jer 29:11-14).